Peace, sanity at family gatherings? Is it possible?
A quick read before you’re out the door to your holiday gatherings.
In the midst of family gatherings that at times can be chaotic, peace and sanity can be difficult to attain. We all have our shtick, our own personal form of nuttiness that drives other family members crazy.
So, how does one feel happy and peaceful at these gatherings without feeling stressed?
Wherever you are this holiday, and with whomever you spend time, a seasoned meditator realizes the power and value of a quiet and undisturbed mind in each and every situation. Living one's life from Quiet’s point of view is to live within a beautiful and sometimes surreal kingdom of absolute peace and imperturbability, even when a family member is absolutely annoying.
Imagine what your life would be like without persistent feelings of frustration, irritation, fear, or sadness hanging around in the background of your mind. You’re likely wondering if this way of living could even be possible, especially during family gatherings.
What if during this holiday you could let go of every annoyance? Just drop them. The irritation with Aunt Susie? The criticism you have of your brother Joe? Your worry about what others will think of the five pounds you’ve gained since last year? Could you just let it all go?
Maybe you think that you need your worry, your analyzing, and your obsessive thinking to avoid the craziness of a family gathering. Maybe you think that if you don’t second guess everything, you will say the wrong thing? Or you’ll make too many mistakes?
Well, here’s the truth. When you’re trying too hard, when you're pressing your ‘mind’ for the answer — an answer that your mind doesn’t have — this simply causes more anxiety. And your anxiety catapults you into a fight or flight mode.
When this happens, you’re even more miserable because your primitive brain will respond to the stress by providing momentum to flee in order to save your life. Yes, we get ‘dumber’ under stress. Who knew?
If this is happening to you two dozen or more times a day, it’s like you have your foot to the floor on the accelerator and your other foot on the brake at the same time.
You’re burning up A LOT of energy just to survive when your actual life isn’t even in danger! The rule of the nervous system is that survival comes first and critical thinking is way down on the list.
So, before you head out to a family gathering, try the introspective approach below and see if you can find a bit of peace in the middle of the family chaos.
See if you can notice what part of ‘you’ is having the experience of trying to fit in, trying to figure something out? What part of ‘you’ is frustrated? Upset? In resistance of some kind?
I think that you know by now that the part of you that is wanting answers is not the place of Quiet.
Whenever you and I struggle with irritation, or with anger or criticism, our ego has hijacked our ability and potential for happiness and having fun at the party.
See if there is something that you have not been able to solve — something you want answered. Would you be willing to let Quiet solve it for you? Check and see if you would be willing to unplug from ego mind and let go of wanting to know how to solve it. Could you let go? Would you be willing to surrender completely to Quiet and let peace have its way?
Whether you have a story, or an irritation that persistently causes you to feel bad, see if you can bring it up into the light and then just drop it. Just let it go and choose Quiet’s place instead.
An amazing thing happens when we unplug from ego mind. We find that Quiet has the answer! BEINGNESS has the answer already!
Could you surrender now to Quiet, even in the midst of chaos, and allow BEINGNESS to just take care of it?
When you make contact with your higher self, and stop identifying with the ego, Quiet will speak to you. Quiet is easy. Quiet is actually very fun. Quiet has a sense of humor! Quiet is wonderfully spontaneous! And, Quiet already has the answers!
What a relief to no longer be captive of a troubled, frustrated and calculating mind that analyzes everything before giving you an answer.
Could you turn everything that bothers you in your life over to Quiet?
When you ask Quiet, it has all the answers for everything in your life and in mine. Could it get any better than that?
Have a very happy and peaceful holiday season!
Copyright 2016 © by Rachel L. Neumann of Your Pathway to Empowerment. All rights reserved. You may quote, copy, translate and link to this article in its entirety as long as you credit Rachel L. Neumann, the author by name, and include a working link back to this web page. All other uses are strictly prohibited.